Aloha H3 #1728
The Walkie Talkie Hash
Hares: Wet & Dirty, Hit Dat Spit White Boy, All You Need is Head, and ThunderDrunk
So, there I was…
As we neared the designated meeting spot for On-Start, it became painfully clear as to why this was named The Walkie Talkie Hash- this one was aptly named for the utter lack of reception in the area. As cell reception cut out several miles before arrival, we abandoned all hope of the possibility of sweet road tunes and simply enjoyed the mounting traffic instead.
As we pulled into the parking lot, we lucked out with a newly vacant parking spot and were surprised by the huge group already gathered. It was great to see so many familiar faces and also a few that we hadn’t seen in forever.
After a few minutes of catching up, the Pack gathered and the Hares explained a few details. There would be several Trail options, including Chicken, who would need to shuttle themselves to the Trailhead. There would be 3 Beer Checks for Eagles, 2 for Turkeys and one for the über ambitious Chickens. We grabbed a quick group photo and then blew the Hares off. A short time later, we finally figured out the carpool situation and hoped into the truck and headed out.
Several of the Pack caught rides to the Trailhead (or so we thought) before walking through a small neighborhood. There were resident several dogs there who weren’t fans of the off-leash crowd encroaching on their territory and an adorable, yet mangy-looking resident cat looking for love.
As we strolled through the neighborhood, we saw a vintage swing set and an oversized Teddy bear playing Guitar Hero and it felt like we’d suddenly been transported to 2012. (That you, Ted?) Once we passed the last house, we followed the blobs and tasty lemon ribbon into the secluded path. At that point, it was just Torque and I, aside from an occasional Teenee spotting. Moments later, we approached the end of that path and found a quiet stream.
We weren’t sure if this would be our Beer Check or not, so we waded into the water and dropped our belongings onto the fallen log several feet passed the bank. There was a cool-looking rock island about 20 feet further. I was feeling especially adventurous, so I followed the submerged dam about half-way there, but the damned thing was covered in algae and it took me out about 2 steps before the end. It was indeed slippery when wet and hurt like hell.
Teenee emerged a few moments later from the opposite bank and I ferried a cold one to him at the rock island. By then, PI and International Dicklomat arrived and kept us company. There was a slow flow where we were, but deeper, faster water just on the other side of the log. You could see crystal clear depths from the underside and it looked too gorgeous to ignore. I began making my way over that damned dam, this time carefully straddling it to avoid slipping. Of course, most of the area from bank to bank was waist-deep or shallower, but there was one small area in the center with a very deep, narrow trench that I found when I stepped off the other side of the dam. At least the water felt great!
Meanwhile, the Turkeys and Eagles followed Trail to Wet & Dirty and also Head’s Beer Checks. They were treated to extra miles, a rope swing, more Beers and (lying) True Trail arrows before they finally found the secret watering hole at White Boy’s Check.
We lounged on the island and enjoyed beverages and the occasional spectacle of Hashers taking the rope swings shortcut to the Beer Check. White Boy brought a small child-sized floatie and a couple hashers floated in the deeper water. DDT helped ferry pups across the steam, but they s somehow managed to soak up all the water anyhow before showering us with it.
Thanks to the walkie talkies, Wet & Dirty and White Boy had been able to communicate effectively throughout, but Head’s (who said Head?) wasn’t in range. She joined us once she shut down her Check and we enjoyed the gorgeous weather and sunned like Hashy mermaids on the island. White Boy busted out the drone and captured some sweet overhead rope swing video, but it narrowly avoided getting soaked when someone assumed an imaginary muggle was filming and tried to splash it out of the sky.
Once more of the Pack had arrived at White Boys’ Beer Check, a few of us bugged out and headed back to the designated Chicken shuttle. Moments later, we were back at the park and debating going for another swim, but abandoned the idea as we began to lose light. It wasn’t long before everyone else was back and we were anxious to get Circle started. Well, the Pack ended up waiting longer than expected to convene Circle because a certain minor cut his bare feet on Trail for the second week in a row. Once everyone was safely back and no longer actively bleeding, we got things started.
Then we celebrated CPS getting her streamer for 25 Aloha Hashes! Kibbles and Vomit and Just Joseph got streamered for 6. One of us, one of us!
Along with Wet & Dirty, White Boy and Head, Thunder was also “Haring”. The Hares were honored for their fabulously wet Trail and mini island adventure. Of course, Thunder wasn’t actually there, so Princess Footlong graciously stepped in as a stunt Thunder. (She was too busy handling multiple balls for all the bubbleheads.)
To further honor, Nasty Gash called Hurly Bird Special into Circle for smartly bringing bug spray on Trail. A few of us managed to injure ourselves in some way on Trail (some more expected than others) and I was I was called in for getting hurt on Chicken Trail. As I accepted my Down-Down, Teenee immediately honored me for ferrying him a Beer immediately after said injury. Redeemed!
Then it was Hashit time! White Boy’s addition was There were no egregious accusations for a change, except for the glaringly obvious Hareless Haring. It was immediately and unanimously decided that Thunder got the Hashit for somehow “Haring” but not actually Haring or even being on Trail.
It had been pitch-black for a while now, so Circle was promptly closed and the Pack was given the standard On-Afters instructions. Everyone scattered and we figured that although we were all the way over in the dead zone, there’s still be a few who make it out. We also knew better than to roll the dice by waiting until we got back to the West Side to deal with the hangries.
On-Afters was take 2 of the wings place, but things weren’t exactly Wild this time.
Nasty Gash and I arrived first and grabbed a table for 10. A few minutes later PI arrived and they agreed to seat us. Turns out, he was the DFL because everyone else straight up bailed. (Hey, at least Nasty and I didn’t grab a 12-top for 2 this time!) It may have been because our party was so small, but everything came out super-fast and was every bit as delicious as it should have been the week before.
We really couldn’t complain. It may have been a long drive home, but those bakes cauli wings were delish and the perfect end to catching up with friends at the damned dam!
-Gex